Hey, guys, it’s Dean. Welcome to the Batman podcast. Today’s episode is a special episode. This is the 100th episode of the Better Man podcast that I’ve done. I’ve started this in, I think, 2021. So to this point I’ve done 100 episodes, combination of several episodes and interview episodes, and since doing them, I’ve learned a lot in the process.
I’ve learned a lot about being a man. I’ve learned a lot about self-improvement. I’ve learned a lot about overall health and wellness. Some of these are ideas and themes that I’ve already believed in and have, you know, consistently implemented and gone deeper into throughout the last few years. And some of these things are totally new ideas. Some of these things are the exact opposite of what I previous to that we believe.
So there’s been a lot of, there’s been a lot of evolution in my own ideas and my own growth as a result of having these conversations as a result of, of of having, as so a podcast and also an interacting with you guys, interacting with the listeners and, figuring out what resonates with you, what doesn’t resonate with you.
So it’s been a journey. and in this episode, I want to share the ten things that I’ve learned, the top most important things that I’ve learned, the ten things, since starting this podcast. But I also want to touch on what’s next for the Better Man podcast. This is wrapping up season four. but what’s next? What’s going to be in season five?
So, you know, my team and I, we’re going to be taking a look at the analytics. we’re going to be looking into the feedback. We’re going to be figuring out what topics are really popular. What are the things that you want to hear about? and I also want to talk with people who haven’t been listening to the podcast, people who really love mental yoga but haven’t listened to the Better Man podcast and figure out, well, what’s preventing you?
Is it is it the length? I know a lot of you guys want shorter podcasts, so that’s definitely something to consider. Is it is it the topics, you know, what is it? So it’s it’s also figuring out how to improve, the Better Man podcast. And then I just want to wrap up with what’s going on in man for yoga now, because, you know, even though we’re taking a break from Better Man podcast, mental yoga is the core of what I do, and that will continue.
And a lot of the themes that you’ll recognize in the betterment podcast exist within mental yoga as well. All right. Let’s get into those ten lessons. Lesson number one is there is tremendous strength in sharing your struggles. I cannot tell you how many people I’ve spoken with who have commended me on my ability to explain my own struggles in a way that relates with them.
So I think this just goes to show that sharing your struggles is not only useful for you, for the person sharing them, but it’s also helpful for the person who is hearing them because they get to realize that they are not the only people having this struggle. They realize, oh, you’re having that problem too. I thought you were perfect.
I thought that you had it all figured it out. But now I know that you’re going through that same issue. You’re you’re going through that struggle as well. And for the person who is expressing the struggle that’s offloading right, that is getting rid of that stress, that is not letting it stay inside of you, getting it out. and, and not necessarily even getting support or the logistics to fix it, but just to express it, just to get it out there and admit that it exist, is extremely powerful.
So lesson number one is the tremendous strength that is involved, in sharing your struggles and just how good that is from a personal health perspective, but also from a social connectivity, perspective. Second lesson is there are far fewer differences between men and women that I assumed. I think one of the ideas that I had and starting the betterment podcast was being able to, you know, talk about self-improvement from the perspective of a man and what I’ve realized going through these podcast, these interviews, is that there are very few instances in which the, you know, the interpretation or the lesson only applies to a man, or applies more so to a man than to
a woman. You know. And that could be because of some of my own beliefs. That could be because of the guests that I’ve had. But, you know, from my perspective, there hasn’t been as many differences between men and women as I initially expected. kind of along this line or related to this is the appreciation that I’ve heard from a lot of people in the Lgbtqia+ community.
For me, using terms like partner or spouse instead of saying husband or wife. So just changing language slightly to be more inclusive. And I know that not all of my guests do that. And I want to say that I don’t think that comes from this place of of mal intent. I think they’re just used to saying one word or the other.
and I hope that if you do hear that, it doesn’t turn you off to the message overall. So that is one thing I wanted to say. I think the third lesson that I wanted to say is that masculinity is under attack. There is this general distrust, in our society of things that are all male. And I know that because I experienced that coming into the Better Man podcast, I was a person who was like, yeah, like toxic masculinity.
What is with that? What is it? And now having conversations with people like, yes, masculinity can be toxic, but also that doesn’t mean that masculinity itself is toxic. That doesn’t mean that being a man is toxic. And so it, you know, there are definitely there are definitely expressions of masculinity that are toxic and that are harmful and that should be stopped.
They should be called out. But also it’s this case of we’re attacking everything that is masculinity, everything that is, we are we are questioning. We are suspicious of things that are all male. And that is wrong. that is wrong. And every guy that I’ve interviewed on here who I’ve respected has been brave enough to say that out loud and say that, hey, like, masculinity is under attack.
you know, and I came across an idea that made sense to me, really resonated with me. Maybe you know what you’ll think about it, but it’s idea that, that masculinity today is kind of in this adolescent phase, kind of in this. I’m a man, kind of phase. It’s coming from this place of, of a lack of security, kind of like this, this idea of aggressively asserting your manhood.
And that’s that’s the kind of that’s the kind of masculinity that I see a lot of in self-improvement circles within men. at least some of the more would I would say that the behaviors that I would prefer not to see. I don’t know why I’m saying that, but I think I think the, the, the just acknowledging the idea that masculinity is under attack, is important to say and that not all forms of masculinity are bad, but that there are definitely certain, you know, certain expressions of it that are.
But, you know, I think that’s an important thing to say. Number four, times of struggle are the biggest opportunities for change. And you guys have probably heard this in the interviews that I’ve done, but so many of the guys that I’ve interviewed, something that I, you know, I found really fulfilling for me and also, you know, really powerful, I think, as a storytelling device is getting people to go back and, and just go back to where they experienced their lowest lows and to understanding how they rebounded from that was how did they learn from the situation?
How did they make sense of their struggles? And what did what do they do? What do they change in order to address the underlying causes or the underlying root issues that that struggle exposed? And, you know, with, with with people who can come out of that successfully, they have there’s tremendous opportunity for growth in those struggles. and it’s just it’s really cool being able to see that in the interviews that I’ve done.
So times of struggle, being some of the biggest opportunities for change in self-improvement is definitely a theme that’s come up, many times. Number five, it is possible to reconcile traditional notions of masculinity with a modern concept of masculinity that makes us better human beings and help us to be kinder to ourselves. This is one of the main reasons I started the Better Man podcast.
I do believe that there are positive expressions of masculinity. I also think that there are ways for us to be masculine and to better take care of ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. And I think that many of the traditional behaviors associated with masculinity, I would say that they’re not really masculine. I would say that in a way, they’re they’re they’re based, I don’t know what you would call them based in, but I think some of the traditional, you know, behaviors associated with masculinity that we would maybe group into the toxic masculinity category or we would put into not even toxic masculinity, but put into a category of men not taking good care of
themselves. when men aren’t taking good care of themselves. I don’t know how that’s, I don’t know how that’s masculine. I think that there, there’s a lack of courage involved when we aren’t taking care of ourselves and we aren’t being honest and saying, hey, I’m going through struggles. And, you know, this kind of leads me into my next point, which is number six, and that is that men are repressing emotions.
We are scared to say what we’re feeling to the people who are close to us. There is courage. Today is less about having the courage to run into a burning building, and it’s more about being able to do what you need to do, to say what you need to feel, to express yourself to and to make an effort to get your overall needs met.
To have the courage to do this, even when society or the people around you are telling you otherwise, or to do all of that despite the fear of how people around you will act. I think this is a really important point to make. I think that men are really hurting themselves by not sharing their emotions, by not being more expressive of quote unquote negative emotions, of talking about struggles that they’re going through.
You know, of persisting with this idea of stoicism. It’s it’s, you know, because people can tell, people can tell even if you’re not expressing emotions, if you’re holding them and people can tell what’s going on. People are, especially, especially, you know, traditionally, women will be able to tell that, you know, my wife will be able to tell my partner will be able to tell when I am not talking about something that’s bothering me.
So even if you are keeping these emotions in, keeping in, these struggles yourself, the people around you are going to realize. So it’s better to at least express those things that you’re struggling with, to let people into the struggles so that you can work together, but also so that you can be more connected with the people around you.
So yeah, men repressing emotions. definitely. definitely a big theme. number seven fits right in with man for yoga, but regular exercise is a severely undervalued part of your overall well-being. I think that everyone that I spoke with who I interviewed had some sort of regular exercise, and I think they, they, they counted it as a big reason or a big contributor to their overall health, energy levels and mood, overall happiness, overall satisfaction, better sleep.
And so if you are not currently exercising on a regular basis, I would encourage you to make a more concerted effort to do so. Number eight, there is a real crisis when it comes to male loneliness. So men spending time in friendships with other men. Most men don’t have much difficulty to find time for exercise. They might struggle with the motivation and the consistency to do it, but most men don’t have difficulty doing that.
What they do have difficulty with is finding time and opportunities to spend time with other men. So I think there is a real crisis when it comes to men spending time with other men. I think there’s a lot of reasons for that. Just the demands that men have, especially if you’re, you know, you have a family, or you’re someone who’s really involved in your community.
It’s just. Or maybe you’re just scared of hurting your partner’s feelings by by going out and hanging out with people other than than he or she. So, I think there is, but based on the conversations that I have, based on the feedback that I’ve had from listeners, I do believe there’s a real crisis when it comes to men spending time with other men.
So number nine, there is one habit that I’ve noticed in particular that creates a noticeable difference in someone’s overall level of calmness or, or ability to be present. and I’ve been able to tell it as soon as I interview people, two people who come to mind are, I can’t remember his name right now, but the relationship guy, Jason Gaines, Jason Gans, and then also, Shane from, the Ward, the mobility Ward.
I think that’s the Brant or ROM ward. Sorry, rom Ward, but those two guys are people who meditate. That’s the that’s the habit they meditate for. Like a half hour at least every day. And gosh, you can tell they just have this different ability to be present and to feel calm. Then other people that I’ve spoken with and it is just, wow, it’s amazing.
So meditation is one thing that I think has, a really incredible impact on your ability to keep yourself calm, to be present. and at those conversations, meeting those people has inspired me to continue to struggle to make meditation a part of my my regular my regular routine. And the 10th thing that I want to include is men need time for reflection and processing in order to move forward, in order to create change, in order to better themselves.
So we need this time where we’re journaling, where we’re setting by ourselves, where we’re meditating, where we’re walking on our own, and where we’re not distracting ourselves with a phone or watching TV, or numbing ourselves with some sort of addiction, whether that’s drinking or eating or working. Working is an addiction to, or porn or whatever it is.
But if, there we really do need more time to be aware of ourselves, to be aware of our actions, to reflect on what we’ve done, to reflect on where we’re going, what is our vision for ourselves. we need more time on our own to be able to do that. And there’s a lot of things preventing us from doing that.
We have demanding jobs, you know, we family life obligations. And even with the free time that we do have, there’s there’s constant distractions from modern technology. your phone, TV, video games. I don’t know if that many people listening play video games, but, there’s so many distractions. It’s so hard to be present. It’s so hard to take time for reflection.
but I think it’s important in order for men to be able to self improve and to have an idea of where they’re going with their lives. So those are my ten things that I’ve learned. There’s definitely a lot more than that. There’s definitely, more lessons. There’s definitely more nuggets of information. But you know, that’s why you can listen to the podcast episodes again.
So go back and check them out. now, what’s the future for the betterment podcast? This is the end of season four. This is our hundredth episode. It’s the end of season four. Moving on to season five. Honestly, I don’t know. I don’t know what the what the focus is going to be. I don’t know, I know that we’re going to keep doing it.
I’m not going to be stopping doing this. I think this is an important mission. I’ve gotten a lot of joy out of doing this. I’ve gotten a lot of personal growth out of doing it. and you probably if you listen to this, you’ll probably know that about me, that if I get something out of it, if I can personally grow from something that I’m doing, I’m probably going to keep doing it.
and I know that you guys have benefited from it as well. So I know that I’m going to keep doing the betterment podcast. But, what am I going to focus on? What’s the format of the episodes going to look like? How many civil episodes that I’m going to do, how many interviews and am I going to do?
Is it going to be once a week? It’s going to be every other week. those are all things that are up in the air. So we’re going to go back to the drawing board and look at analytics and figure out what messages are really resonating with people, what podcast episodes are more popular? and we’ll, we’ll craft the, you know, we’ll craft the agenda based on that.
I’m going to keep dreaming big and reaching out to the people that that I admire and people that I’d love to have on the podcast. And, you know, hopefully, people who also resonate well with you, I think that’s the more important part, is making sure that the guests don’t, aren’t just people that I respect, but also people that you guys are interested in hearing from as well.
And, getting into the analytics and looking at the trends, looking at, the popular guest, I think we’re going to be able to figure that out really well and, and come back new and improved and ready for season five. while you’re waiting for that and man, for yoga, I have, been slowly killing myself to create, create, this, this new venture called man for yoga.
Engage. And, it’s been a it’s been a learning process. We’ve done a lot of surveys, a lot of conversations with customers. and I’m really excited about this new version that we’re launching this beta to the version, in addition to the existing platform that we have, a community kind of like Facebook, but only for man, for yoga and it’s a lot cleaner.
And there’s, more discussion topics to choose from. So in addition to that, in addition to the live Q&A, follow along workouts, that and the guest expert Q&A is that we already do. We’re also going to be launching watch Party workouts, where you can follow along to a group workout. as part of a video call or launching group coaching calls.
And we’re actually hiring multiple engage coaches to be able to run those calls so people can come in, talk about their struggles, get information, get support, talk through things, see what other things that guys are going through, or also creating subgroups so that you can interact with like minded communities. and there’s probably a few other things on the list that I’m currently forgetting.
oh. We’re also launching monthly themes as part of this. So, monthly themes and then also, weekly challenge workouts. So you’ll have workouts to do as a community every week. So we’re putting a lot more into this. And we’re also reducing the price from what was originally $99 a month to just $29 a month. So this is something that I’m really excited about.
I’ve had a ton of calls with you guys to figure out what is going to be more popular, and I think this is going to be it. So, we’re launching this on July 1st. I’m really excited to see how this goes. I think it’s going to, be pretty successful, and I’m really excited to see how it goes.
Nervous, but also excited. So that’s going on demand for yoga, in addition to continuing, you know, our weekly workouts in the members area. And, you know, we’re still putting out YouTube videos once a week. Our social media and, all of that continues. So, but little Paws for the betterment podcast, just to give myself, because it does take a lot of time.
It’s kind of surprising how much time a podcast takes, even though it’s just one episode per week. There’s a lot of time that goes into that. There’s a lot of stuff that the team has to do to make that happen. So, it is not, it is not a small endeavor. so there. Anyways, I want to thank you guys again for listening to this 100 episode.
I hope you guys will is in some shape or form. Continue with man for yoga. Continue with what we’re doing. if you’re not already members area easiest way to get started. And then also we do have a free seven day challenge, which you can sign up for at man for yoga.com/7 DC to get, seven workouts, 15 minute workouts to teach you how yoga can help you with your everyday life.
Thank you for your stronger, more flexible, get rid of pain, all that good stuff. So thanks guys for listening. Thanks for being here. I’ll look forward to seeing you on another episode soon. If you haven’t already, please leave a review for the Betterment podcast. Wherever you listen to podcast, you can do that on Apple Podcasts. You can also do that on Spotify.
but, right now I think we’re close to 150 reviews. So, I’d love it if you could help out some more reviews. And then that’s, that’s all I’ve got. All right, guys, I’ll see you on the next episode when we launch for season five. Bye. Take care.
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